Monday, February 8, 2010


Today, a woman told me I am an inspiration to her. That she appreciates my help and input. That I look happy.

And then I realized, I am happy.

I have gone 36 days without purging. This doesn't mean I haven't acted on my ED in small ways, but I haven't done the behavior that hurts by body, my weight, and my mind the most. Honestly, I think I am going to stop counting days off and just enjoy the extended normalcy. I like having a number, but it makes this streak too abnormal and special; it IS special, but I want it to feel normal. I have spent that last 3 years allowing ED to feel normal, and it's time for a change.

It's an amazing compliment to be called an inspiration. Its an amazing experience. And, in truth, she's not exactly the first. During my recent recovery, I have received many wonderful messages of support, and I thank those of you who've expressed care. You know who you are :)

I have a question for all of you-who do you look towards for inspiration? What do you consider inspirational? Sometimes, its important to have figures to look at when we need a little help, and I want to know what helps you.

Wow, what a cheesy blog. But sometimes, cheese is good :) Those warm fuzzies fill a space in your body food can never get to, know matter how hard we try to fill it with cookies and ice cream.

36 days and I'm still going strong.

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